Some traditions will not allow for a wedding to take place during the year. People sometimes blurt out statements in the hope of comforting the grieving, but achieve exactly the opposite. We'll help you get your affairs in order and make sure nothing is left out. Hare Krishna. Generally, only people who are particularly invited to the shraddha ceremony will attend. then, practice it out loud, preferably in front of another person or a mirror. (1995). https://www.learnreligions.com/healing-words-for-tragic-times-1770148. As an elder or wise member of the community, it would still be common to invoke Lord Krishnas name even if this is the parents chosen lifestyle. The act of explaining to the son or daughter or other close relatives about the good nature and help rendered by the deceased and give condolences to them is called Enquiring about the grief. Some friends have the knack for hitting all the right notes and saying all of the right things. It is best to make the enquiries on the day of death, and remain close to the bereaved and assisting them.If this is not possible, one can visit the house on even days except monday, tuesday and friday., even the monday is an even day thanjavur dist. All rights reserved. Most of the Hindu mourning rituals performed are designed to promote the free expression of emotions. Memorial Day for Divorced Parents | Holiday Visitation Schedules Where are we meeting for lunch today?, How was the movie last night?, Whats the score? are typical blunders that happen, which impart an uncaring celebratory tone to the visit. Silence is a good option; a kind gesture can speak better than words. In order to settle the estate, all outstanding bills and dues that the How To Express Sympathy: What To Say And What Weve compiled a list of things to sayand things to avoid sayingwhen A Quick Overview Of Proper Funeral Etiquette. Das, S. (n.d.). After the mourning period, it is appropriate to visit the deceaseds family at their place. Envisioning Fatherhood: Indian Fathers' Perceptions of an Ideal Father. 12. And while most of the information provided above mixes trust with credible sources, theres such variety to the Hindu culture and faith systems that what works in one scenario may not work in another. In this sect of Hinduism, there's no food or drink offered to the family for up to 10 days. On behalf of my family, I want to say how sorry we are for your loss. In Hinduism, theres samsarathe continuous cycle of reincarnation. It's a good idea to have a friend read over your eulogy. It is unborn, eternal, permanent, and primeval. Generally, one can expect to listen to mantras being chanted around the deceaseds body at a house funeral. You can also donate financially if you can. Weather conditions, circumstances and setting of the funeral, and religious and cultural traditions may affect the choices for clothing made. It is also appropriate in Hindu tradition to send sympathy gifts. What customs and traditions should I be aware of so that I can be respectful? Explain that you don't feel you can do it, and be honest as to why. This period of time is rooted in traditional beliefs, with each of the day being divided into "minor days" (4 days for each week). Viewing the body is not mandatory, but is usually considered respectful if the casket is open and displayed near the family. It is a common slip-up for people to assume that sharing their own religious beliefs would bring solace to the bereaved family. Food will be served following the ceremony. This may include feelings of shock, sadness, and even guilt. In the United States, cremation needs to be performed only by a licensed crematory. Hare Krishna. In Hinduism, there is no judgment day as there are in Christian belief systems. However, mourners should check with the family or the funeral director to find out what's appropriate for the funeral they are attending. A Hindu death ritual comprises of three parts: So, the actual funeral takes place at the deceaseds home, although actual events can be considered a wake according to western standards because of its short span. Keep your pet leashed, and clean up after it. She may depend on you entirely or she may wish to participate in the planning and have you take care of the details. In many locales, even those who don't know each other will rally to assist bereaved neighbors in some way. It is appropriate to visit the home of the family as anexpression of comfort and support. Loss is hard. During this period, the close relatives of the deceased person abstain from celebrations and . Ask for his/her input and a checklist of what needs to be decided and completed. Various worldwide locations connote different customs and norms. While every group has slightly different funeral practices, theres a general set of funeral rites that all follow in this community. Medical decision making is among the most complex tasks known to man; and not all decisions lead to a positive outcome, although taken in good faith. Post Funeral. I understand that not only did your friend mean a great deal to you, but also that Keyur was well-loved by his family and community. Work from your dream country on a remote visa, A peek into where heads of various countries reside across the globe, This Diwali, try our tasty banana pudding recipe, Heal Thy Self | Early warning signs you could be in an abusive relationship, On yoga day, Krishnaprabha is an inspiration. E-mail is a immediate way to reach out and say, "I'm sorry. We often hear people say things like Dont be sad, Dont cry, It is all for good, I know how you feel, He is in a better place now in an attempt to provide comfort. You have a great responsibility now. Every one of the rituals within the Hindu ceremonies is a reality check to help us confront our grief, interact with it, accept it and keep going on--both in life and spiritually.". Women need to dress conservatively with knees and arms covered. Financial and logistics assistancewhere acceptable and appropriatecan be a big relief. Deciding to stop by at a funeral on the way to a wedding, therefore, can be suicidal. 4. A Hindu priest will be invited to visit and to purify the house with incense, prayers and mantra. to an Orthodox Hindu for their sibling, youll find that the atmosphere of condolences is much different. If this cultural shift is your cousins history, it might be appropriate to mention that distinction to honor them both after offering condolences. Sharma, A. It is not uncommon to hear one person pass a negative remark about the deceased persons character, soon to be joined by other likeminded people who fuel the conversation into a full-fledged debate. They'll surely understand. Our Religions: The Seven World Religions Introduced by Preeminent Scholars From Each Tradition. Choosing an appropriate date to bring home newborn. She lived her life to its fullest, so we should celebrate her life to honor her legacy. There is often an emphasis on white flowers. Many people follow thirteen days of. After someone dies, their body should be treated with respect. Friends may call or visit family members of the deceased to offer their condolences upon hearing of the death and may bring flowers to them at that time. Drop her a note periodically, or even an e-mail, to let her know you're thinking of her. A notice would either state the hour and location of the service, which would mean that it would be appropriate for you to attend if you wished, or it would indicate if the service is private. Hindu funeral rituals decree that cremation is the custom, but the deceased body remains in the home of the family until you move it to the cremation place. Be sensitive to the level of help your friend is asking for. For instance, the death of a teenager is perceived differently from that of a 90-year-old. It's appropriate to visit the family at their home after their period of mourning, which typically lasts 10 days. I'm here for you." Our expert guidance can make your life a little easier during this time. Keep your friend informed and get her feedback. Hinduism and Bereavement | Good Thinking LinkedIn. Eastern Orhtodox During the period before burial (three days after death), flowers may be sent to the funeral home. Everyone in this community respected your father. When it comes to jewelry, they should not wear anything flashy and keep it light. The Good Thinking team has produced this short guide to help anyone in the Hindu community across London who has lost a loved one, and to help health and care professionals who are supporting terminally ill patients of the Hindu faith. The funeral directors will take the body for bathing, dressing and anointing with the permission and in the presence of chosen friends and relatives before the funeral rites take place. (Extra chairs can be made available for the elderly.) There are all kinds of people in the world with vastly contrasting belief systemseach convinced that theirs is the right version. The Awesome Etiquette podcast is a weekly Q&A show where hosts, (cousins, and co-presidents of the Emily Post Institute,) Lizzie Post and Dan Post Senning answer audience questions, tackle etiquette topics in detail and salute good etiquette witnessed by the Awesome Etiquette audience. While the thirteen day intense period of Hindu mourning rituals may involve family and friends, the immediate family of the deceased is considered in mourning for a year following the death of the loved one. If they are in hospital, it is helpful to inform the chaplain about their spiritual needs (with the patients permission). May Lord Krishna grant you strength. Friends and relatives may visit to offer condolences and participate in Hindu prayer and scriptural readings to provide solace to the bereaved. Find Appropriate Sympathy & Condolence Baskets. Upon learning of the death of a family member, friend or colleague, it is common to contact a member of the family to express condolences and offer help and assistance. Likewise, the person who passes an ugly remark at a solemn family function might not even realise what he said or did was hurtful. Well take you through some examples of condolences or sympathies below and try to iron out whats commonplace or whats appropriate in specific contexts. During the ceremony, non-Hindus can sit quietly. Household items like decorative rugs, afghans and blankets make appropriate gifts to honor the memory of the loved one. As a general rule, the closer your relationship to the bereaved, the sooner you should contact him or her. If there is no relationship with the family, introduce yourself and briefly explain your relationship with the deceased. Here are some thoughts and guidelines when considering a personal visit at the funeral home: Upon arrival, go to the family and express a simple condolence. In all branches of Hinduism, family plays a key role in helping their loved one prepare for their death and rebirth. Bereaved Etiquette for the Loved Ones on the Day of the Funeral It's best to wait until the funeral service is over to greet the family, unless they're greeting people before the service. In Hindu death rituals, no recording devices are allowed, and the reading source is Mantra. Once the major decisions have been made, visit, or at least speak with, the person performing the service. The world of Emily Post etiquette advice is at your fingertips. The length of the mourning period in Korea is largely dependent on the individual and is traditionally for 100 days. Deepest condolence messages very helpful in grief - India Today Where would it be held? It's worth noting that some communities and faiths have an open casket at the visitation and at the funeral service. Accept, Whats regionally accepted in Southern India, for example, may not be appropriate or even standard in the North. Perhaps your friends child died as a teenager and didnt have a chance to go to university or get married for many reasons. Weapons do not cut this Spirit, fire does not burn it, water does not make it wet, and the wind does not make it dry. For a parent, sons and daughters are equally precious. If a Hindu, they can participate in the chanting of mantras. After all, some of the wisest people can almost convey a book in a matter of a sentence. Hindu Funeral Traditions - Renaissance Funeral Home See if you would agree. While there's no rule book, the visitation, whether held at a funeral home or the family's home, is a good opportunity to express your condolences. Members of the immediate family aren't chosen, as their place is with the family. Organ donation is accepted and encouraged in the Hindu faith and should be discussed with the family when appropriate. There is no need to cover the head. Complete Guide to Hindu Funerals - TFS Funeral Flowers Singapore Traditionally, Hindus like to have the ashes spread on the Ganges Rivers waters in India. Below, well use this concept in offering messages for the loss of a child. Weapons do not cut this Spirit, fire does not burn it, water does not make it wet, and the wind does not make it dry. When attending a senior persons funeral, enquiring publicly about the age of the deceased is inappropriate, whereas nodding in approval of the stated age is downright rude. According to my calculations based on astrology, he could not have chosen a better time to die is another example of saying the wrong thing in the wrong place at the wrong time. Here, the priest oversees every activity. What rituals take place before someone dies? There may be a request to turn the patients bed so their head faces east or for the patient to be allowed to lie on the floor in the moments before death (so that they are close to mother earth and their soul can depart easily). While it can be difficult to know just what to say to someone who has experienced a death, many people who have experienced a death appreciate being contacted. In such situations too, it is helpful to remember that no hospital would knowingly do anything that could harm the patient. Caring for someone who is dying involves looking after their physical, emotional and spiritual needs. Whilst it is favourable to do this within 24 hours, it is widely accepted amongst the Hindu community that the administrative process will take longer in the UK. Few people are comfortable visiting a home where death has just occurred. Before the funeral, Catholics hold the Vigil (Wake). This short message gets to the essence of the Hindu faith in just a few short words. There are several ways to show honor and to respect the memory of the departed, including visiting in person. The more you practice, the more comfortable you will be delivering it at the service. We depend on advertising to keep our content free for you. If you didn't know him, you could mention something special you've heard about him. Although attitudes and risk tolerances vary, no sane parent would knowingly do anything that would harm their child. Are others going to be speaking about her? Visitations are usually held one or two days prior to the funeral service during a fixed set of hours. If you knew him, some kind words about himperhaps an anecdotewould mean a lot. After the funeral, friends may visit the bereaved, usually bringing gifts of fruit. Friends may call or visit family members of the deceased to offer their condolences upon hearing of the death and may bring flowers to them at that time. Is there a member of the clergy or other person she has in mind for performing the service? What to Send: Sympathy flowers and sympathy cards are appropriate Hindu funeral rites Hindu funeral service: Traditionally, the body remains at the home of the deceased or in a funeral parlor until it is cremated, which is usually within 24 hours after death. Offer your help in other ways, such as ushering, delivering a reading, preparing the program for the service, or assisting the family with plans for the service or for any reception afterwards (if there is one). Chances are youll know this about your friends familial history enough to gauge an appropriate message based on his upbringing.

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